2008 ~

2008 ,another new year has come.
Nothing difference this year.. i am getting busy and busier..
No time to update my blog...
I just finished reading one of my best friends' blog...
I didn't know he was angry with me...I was so sorry to him and angry myself too..
I have been trying so hard to keep in touch with all of my best friends..I will call everyone out when I got holiday..that is the only way that i get to see all of them..but Some of them just keeps rejecting me with thousand of reasons.Every times, I am the only one who need to ask them out and call them if they are coming ..I really find no points why I must do like that,I care about them, but they never think the same way as i did..
Sometimes,I really just hope to invite few people who can turn up enough. But ,when i do like that, some people will blame me for neglecting them..do they ever think about my condition? I hate myself for holding tight to everyone that I used to be friends...I hate myself for holding that stupid gathering until making someone annoy with me..I am so sorry..I didn't mean it..really...and I promised it won't happen next time anymore as I ain't going to waste my time to organize any gathering ...
I am tired ...=.= sigh....


human changes all the time..
if not the past memories which still holding me to them...
I think i wouldn't be so caring to them...
My feeling towards you will always stay from the day we met until the day you have gone...
Our friendship Died in the day you become different...
No matter how many times you try to make me into hot water..
No matter how many times you backstab me...
No matter how many times you betray me...

I will still appreciate you for being so helpful
and brought me so many happy memories before this...
I still take you as my best friends even though you are no longer the same...
If one day, you come back to me...
I will still take you as my best friends...
I hope we can share all the memories and secrets together again..
I really don't know what is wrong with our friendship..
I alwasy take it serious...
I really don't know thing will change so fast in such a short period..
I am so sorry for leaving you all...
I know it is too late when i went back to there again..
But I thought You all will really happy for me for being chosen to a good school...
I thought you all will always the same...
I thought our friendship can really last forever...

Apparently , Friendship is just like a plant...
you must always watering and fertilise it....
Once you lazy to take care of it,
It will die off...

I am sorry...
I didn't realize my left will bring you all such a big change....


~ Saint vs Sin~

Second options doesn't always seem to be a bad choice ~

Long time seldom blogging ...

I would like to start my blog from my memories during the last Christmas 2007

Now already 2008, years by years, days by days, time passes non-stop

There are too many things need to be remembered , appreciated and to recall from time to time

If you just let it passes like that, you might won't be able to remember it anymore..

You might even think it never happens before...

Because you have forgotten...

Your brain will renew everyday and there is not everything our brains can store inside it..

Hence, while my memories still fresh...I would like to write it down..

...To keep all these footprints of life inside a space....as a remembrance....

I would like to share my 18 year-old puppy love story~

During my form 4 year, I knew a guy from my best friends...

This guy is introduced for me to teach me add maths and to finish math project

We never see each other before, We just chatted through msn, email and sms.

First time i met this guy, in my impression, He is a cool , humorous and smart guy...

Honestly, he really taught me a lot of things and I had totally had a crushed on him...

Every times when we online, we would talk to each other until midnight..

WE played and had lots of fun together..

That makes me even fall in love deeply with him..

I liked him, I bet he knew it too...

Just I am not a nice looking girl, my appearance blocked things to work out...

I was really hurt that time when i knew we were impossible to be together...

We even quarreled once.....it made me cried....ha ha...

After that, we did not talk for few weeks...

I blocked him up from my msn's list

So every time when i was on9, he couldn't see me

Few weeks ago, I unblocked him and we started to talk again.

One day, while i was having conversation with my best friends , he suddenly added us to another chat box where he was having conversation with his cousin brother who older than us for 5 years...

I saw his cousin brother before, not good looking because of a little bit obese

He knew my best friends was fond of business , and his cousin was working as the market executive...thus , they all started to chat...

I could hardly talk something as I didn't know what to say ...

Until my best friends left....

They started to talk something "easy to understand"(my level) with me...

and from there, I knew his cousin better...

Few months ago, we both got the National service offer...

I was so happy and dreaming if we could meet each other..

But at last we both got the different batch...

He got the first : I got the second....

It means he will go for the first 3 months while i will go 3 months after that...

We couldn't chat with each other everyday anymore....

while he was having his NS...

I just talked to his cousin...

compared to him, his cousin is more easier to communicate for me

We can really talk a lot ,crap non-stop...

We both have many similarities...

3 months after i got backed from my NS, He already got girlfriend...

After that, we even rarely talked to each other...

I was happy that he got someone he loved with...

And i started to focus on my academic....

days by the days.... we become best friends until now...

He broke with his gf few months ago because of parents disapproval...

his gf flied to United kingdom to pursuit her study...

they are even apart farther now...

but I know he still loves his gf very much even until now...

He hurts a lot from that relationship...

they both love each other so much, but because of parents , they couldn't be together for now...

However, I am so happy I can be his best friends until now...

Lover maybe would be better for me before that...

albeit, Lover can't guarantee you forever while friends do....

hence, second options doesn't always seem to be a bad choice....