Result ... ever wonder *

Result was out yesterday, as i used to expect, I did not get what I want. =S and knowing many out there doing better and so much good than me, surprisingly, I feel calm and able to congratz and happy for them from bottom of my heart. Last time I was up there to celebrate but now I am down here to see and share the happiness.

A setback like this is a reminder in life for me. I got back my courage and able to move on. Praise God that I can accept it easily although with tears. I am able to console others. =P Seriously thinking back my past, I once was on the top of hill and once I was no where else where i could not see my own position. This setback is already something I use to. because my ability is kinda of limited. Only some setbacks like this will push me even harder than before. I take it with a smile (whatever kind of smile you say).

My own selfishness still under controlled, I encourage people to email lecturer, teach them to fight and hope for the best regardless it might affect my position. But I know others deserve it more than I do. ( you might ask me how sure are you? ) haha. I am sure. I am a lucky girl who might not always seem to be lucky but you see People pay attention to me, olders care about me. Parents even superb.

I talked to my dad about pre-marital sex last night, from his opinion, it is fine to have sex before marriage but must be respobsible for whatever we do. must be with a fix person ,not simply make love and fool around. I knew his answer. Cause I thought the same too. Anyway, it is better to have it after marriage.

As a father, although he has a bad-temper, always speak loudly and scold loudly like a boss because it is his nature ( I can say), stressful works and workers make him to be who he is today. Anyway, he is open-minded, he talked to me regardless of I am a daughter or son of him. I am touched that he told me that He treat this life as nothing, nothing not as if zero or empty all that. Just he will do his best for his life and his family. But to live how long in this earth is not important at all for him. He told me, as a father, what i can do is buy insurans, anything happens on me, my family is still able to survive. You might not find this sentence touching, insurans isn't about the money but responsibility towards their loved one when they no longer able to protect their loved one. I look at him and I know how much he loves us. The way he loves us is not soemthing we can see but his love is something which it might take you a long time to realize or maybe after he has gone only you will discover.

I got a message from God, it is an application from facebook. My dear told me God notices me. The application is a group of people doing the job to send message to those who believes. I always read it. Maybe God talks to them about my problem. Because I always receive something I really need. It helps me. Here is what i receive:

On this day, God wants you to know..
.. That recession is also a time of great opportunity. Time and time again in success has its roots in failure, because failure knocks you down from top of the hill so you can then climb a mountain. Yes, it's unsettling, yes it's scary. But this can be your greatest opportunity in life, - if you choose it. The recession has cleared the space of clutter,- Think what have you always wanted to do but brushed aside from the top of your hill? Now, is the time...

Praise God.